Last Year

I'm remembering you and this night last year and the excitement of being next to you. I'm remembering my heart pounding and the smile on my face as we celebrated the start of a new year together. I'm remembering it all like it happened yesterday and I'm missing you tonight.

Happy New Year, S----.

Awkward Moment of the Week

While browsing through jewelry at the mall with my mom the other day we ran into a lady she had worked with and her husband. After chatting for quite a bit about family and awkward situations, the woman mentioned how someone she knew brought his ex-wife to a lot of family events ever since she came out of the closet. Her husband tacked on that the ex-wife's daughter also came out of the closet and quickly mumbled "It's disgusting" to finish off his sentence.To complete the awkwardness of this moment, a slew of conversation ensued about gays in society and how unnatural and wrong their relationships are while I stood next to my mother, wearing the necklace that my ex-girlfriend gave me, a bracelet with Bee's name on it, and a Live in Love bracelet that my gay best friend gave me several years ago, all the while thinking You have no idea what you're talking about and wondering what they would say if they knew that all the judgmental things they were saying applied to me too. 

Judge away, world. I'm going to love who I'm going to love. 

I miss my bee

Home for the Holidays

So, I have two grandmothers - one is evil and one is SuperAwesomeAmazing. Every year we spend Christmas Eve at Awesome!Grandma's and we see Evil!Grandma Christmas day when we go to my aunt and uncle's for brunch. This year, however, Evil!Grandma is going to spend Christmas Eve with us (my parents and me) at Awesome!Grandma's house and then sleeping over and spending Christmas morning with us since her boyfriend of 17 years broke up with her. I'm not sure if hell is going to freeze over, but I'm pretty sure some crazy times are about to ensue.

UPDATE:

Evil!Grandma no longer ruining attending Christmas Eve dinner. Phew

I don't understand how people that call themselves your best friends can be so selfish about spending time with them. I love my friends, but the holidays aren't all about them. Sorry. I came home to see my family. Not them.

UPDATE


Friend situation resolved. Sort of.

I miss everything about you today. It sucks. I just want to be with you even though I know it's the worst decision in the world. When I found out you got a girlfriend I tried to act like I didn't care, but I do. I care so much that it's eating me up inside. Knowing that you're going to be right down the street from me in a day makes me sick. I want so badly to not care about you or about what we had, but right now it feels like I'll never stop caring.

To C----------

Sometimes I wonder if I should just go for it. You've been in love with me for years, and yet I've never felt the same way about you. I wish I knew how to like you. It would be so easy with us. Every time you talk about another girl I know that I get jealous, but why? I've never felt anything for you other than friendship. I'm sorry. It's all a little hazy for me.